Dehydration
by Tronic
Summary: Suigetsu experiences dehydration. He will never be the same ever again.


**A/N: I've always wondered what would happen to Suigetsu if he got dehydrated..**

**Disclaimer: Masashi Kishimoto owns Naruto and all it's characters kthnx.

* * *

**

"Baby, if I act like _thaaaat_, flipping my blond hair _baaaack_, Push up my bra like _thaaaat_,.."

A distracted, razor-toothed teenager sang lowly and rocked his head back and fourth while walking, swaying and allowing his hair to brush up against his cheeks as he did.

"Maybe if I act like _thaaaat_, that guy will call me _baaack_, Porno Paparazzi girl, I don't wanna be a stupid girl!"

Suigetsu continued to chant those vile, chipper lyrics, only in a much higher and cheery tone. He happily bounced on top of his feet; kicking up dirt and a few small rocks as he did.

Karin, who was walking just a few feet in front of Suigetsu, nearly exploded at the sound of the shark-toothed boy's wretched voice. "That's it! I've had enough of your fucking singing!"

She stopped dead in her tracks and whipped around to face Suigetsu.

"Oh, perhaps you'd like this song better.." The blue-ish/silver-ish-haired teen smirked devilishly, a mad grin curling his lips as he opened his mouth, revealing the mini-daggers resting within..

"Get you where you wanna go if you know what I mean, Got a ride that's smoother than a _limousine_! Can you handle the curves? Can you run all the _lights_? If you can, baby boy then we can go all _ni_--!!"

Karin immediately darted up to Suigetsu and proceeded to drive her fist through his face in response to his singing. Though, all she received was a soaking-wet sleeve.

Suigetsu made an attempt to dodge her dainty-looking little fist, but was struck by the side of it anyway. He tumbled down into the uncomfortable soil beneath him that was being fried by the sun.

But instead of giving him a chance to recover, Karin got a cruel idea.

She reached down and quickly swiped up one of his filled water bottles,.. as she watched his eyes widen into walnut-sized circles, a smirk appeared across her lips.

"Heres lookin at you." As the sun burned the top of her head, Karin kept her manic smile while popping open the lid of Suigetsu's water bottle. She began to tilt the bottle slowly until it was upside down, then watched the water pour out with malice tainting her glare.

"You queef! That's my last one!" Suigetsu immediately shot up and desperately tried to recover his stolen liquid, but was two seconds too late.

"That makes it even _better_!" The girl with glasses exclaimed joyfully, then casually tossed the empty container away.

Suigetsu's gaze loomed sadly to the small remnince of water left-- which was quickly drying up, thanks to the heat.

"Would you two shut up.. it's hard enough applying my eyeliner while walking without you two continuously jaw-jacking." A teen with duck-butt hair sighed loudly while squinting into a tiny hand-mirror.

Suigetsu planted his fist firmly into the ground, then stood up. He could already feel himself getting weaker..

"Well, Sas-oo-kay.." He began, but lost his train of thought. Almost as if the lack of water took immediate affect...

"Look what that.. bitch has already done to me." Suigetsu spoke faintly, his voice short and breathy. He waddled around for a few minute, walking along side Sasuke, Juugo and Karin. All while the red-headed girl laughed at how he grew weaker with every step he took.

"I can carry you, if you like, Sui--" Juugo offered, but was cut off by the sound of a loud thud.

"Only pansies can't go five minutes without downing ten gallons of water." Karin rolled her eyes annoyingly, then poked Suigetsu's collapsed and near unconscious body.

Sighing, Sasuke clasped his makeup within his hands, (which he was _still_ applying) and stuffed the tiny bottles and pencils into his pocket.

"Th-this is just not working." He began to complain in a whiney and homo-ish voice, placing one hand on his hip and rubbing his temples gayly with the other.

"Juugo," Sasuke glanced over in Juugo's direction, "Carry his evaporating ass, will you?"

Juugo nodded, then threw Suigetsu over his shoulder forcefully.

A distant "Oof!" escaped the normally happy teenager's throat as he was thrown up over the very tall person.

Twenty Horrible minutes passed, and Suigetsu felt himself getting weaker and weaker. Almost as if he _were_ evaporating, as Sasuke mentioned earlier.

As if that weren't enough, he felt himself losing what consciousness he had. He couldn't open his eyes anymore, and to Juugo, his body continued to grow lighter.

"Uhm, Sasuke.." The frighteningly tall Juugo quivered.

"Ugh, what now?!" Sasuke flailed his arms, again, _gayly_.

"I think Suigetsu is...--"

"Suigetsu is gone!" Juugo was once again interrupted, and this time by Karin's surprised screech.

Confused, Sasuke turned around to his underlings. He walked up to Juugo and inspected _every inch_ of his (Juugo's) body_ very_ carefully.

Then came to the conclusion that... "Suigetsu evaporated."

"Evaporated?" Karin quoted Sasuke almost worriedly.

But before anyone else could speak, a loud clash of thunder cried out through the skies-- startling them all. Sasuke the most, though, as he cried out like a little baby girl.

A drop of rain landed right in Sasuke's eye. Sasuke yellped out a terrified squeak, then looked up angerly at the sky with one eye open.

"GAHAHAHAAHHAAHHH!!"

Suddenly from a giant, dark-gray cloud, proud, evil laughter rang. What was extra creepy was, it seemed to be directed at '_them_' specifically.

"That laugh..--" A chill rain down Karin's spine, "It's not.. no, it couldn't be!" She denied the idea that suddenly popped inside of her head.

"Oh, God, no.." Sasuke whimpered.

"So _that's_ where Suigetsu got to." Juugo concluded, feeling slightly relieved while his two partners began to run like hell.

And from that day forward, every where that they went, the dreaded Suigetsu Cloud followed. Raining upon them almost constantly, and striking Karin and Sasuke with lightening on occasion.

They would never feel the sensation of being dry ever again.

* * *

**N/A: If you can guess the songs Suigetsu was singing, I will be fecking impressed.**


End file.
